


If I Die Young

by ink_writes16



Category: Newsies (1992), Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: F/F, M/M, tw: death, tw: hospital, tw: shooting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2020-01-11 08:07:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18426495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ink_writes16/pseuds/ink_writes16
Summary: If I die young,Bury me in satin,Lay me down on a bed of roses,Sink me in the river at dawn,Send me away with the words of a love song





	If I Die Young

**Author's Note:**

> Whatever has astrisks around it is the song

Sarah skipped yet another song on her Spotify playlist and put her hand back on the steering wheel. 

*If I die young bury me in Satin   
Lay me down on a bed of roses  
Sink me in the river, at dawn  
Send me away with the words of a love song*

Sarah reached for the skip button again. 

“I swear to god, Sarah,” Katherine grabbed her girlfriends wrist playfully. “If you skip this song, you will lose your finger.” Sarah laughed and pulled her arm away.  
Katherine sang along.

*life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no  
Ain't even gray, but she buries her baby  
The sharp knife of a short life*

Sarah smiled as she glanced over at Katherine, who was singing as loud as she could. She could tell she was at peace and Sarah was happy that, despite everything happening with her family, Katherine could still let loose and enjoy herself.

\-----

*Lord, make me a rainbow, I'll shine down on my mother  
She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors  
Oh, and life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no  
Ain't even gray, but she buries her baby*

\-----

The last shovel full of dirt was dumped on top of the mound. Sarah stared at the mound, hoping, praying, that she would climb her way out of the casket and through the dirt and would crawl back into her arms. It wouldn’t happen, no matter how hard she begged. This was real life, not some video game or movie. A single tear slipped down her cheek and she wiped it before anyone saw. She had to be strong, she couldn’t break, not here, not now.

“Saz…” Davey’s hand appeared on her elbow, trying to pull her away. She shook her head and cleared her throat. 

“Uh, just go without me. I’ll walk.” Davey hesitated, but nodded and walked to Spot, who was waiting for him a few feet away. He lingered and looked at his sister but Spot pulled him away. 

“She just needs some time,” she heard Spot say. “She’ll be okay.” 

Would she be? It was hard to believe that she’d be able to get over this. What did she have to go back to? An empty house? She couldn’t do it. She needed Katherine more than anything. Her whole body ached and she just wanted to have her back. If she had been there with her… she could be with her now. Or they wouldn’t have gotten hurt at all. They wouldn’t kill two reporters, or a reporter and her wife. Strength in numbers. 

\-----

*And I'll be wearing white when I come into your kingdom  
I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger*

\-----

Katherine put her notepad and pen in her purse. She looked up as Sarah came around the corner, out of the kitchen. They smiled at each other.

“You look nice,” Katherine said. Sarah’s smile faded when she noticed her wife was about to leave.

“Where are going?” 

“I have a lead on a story that I have to get to.” Sarah scoffed quietly and massaged her temples. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s date night.”

“Oh… Saz, I’m so s-” Sarah put a hand up to stop her and turned away to pack up the dishes she had set out for the night. 

“No, it’s fine. Go catch that lead.” She looked over her shoulder and added, “Sounds important.”

“Don’t be like that.” Sarah dropped the stack of plates back onto the table with a crash and turned to the redhead.

“Be like what, Kath? Don’t be mad? Because every time we plan a date night, the night comes around and you blow it off because of some lead.”

“You’re mad because I have to work?”

“You work every night!” She shook her head. “You can take one night to have a nice dinner with me. A nice home cooked meal.” 

“I don’t have time for this.” Katherine grabbed her keys and moved toward the door. 

“If you walk out, don’t expect to find me here when you come back.” She stopped and looked at Sarah. 

“Are you kidding me? You're going to leave me cause I’m missing date night?”

“No. I’m going to stay somewhere else because you don’t seem to want me here anyway.”

“Is that what you think?” Katherine asked incredulously.

“It’s what you’ve shown me! You’re never home cause you’re ‘following a lead’. And when you are home you’re in your office writing an article.”

“Because I’m a reporter. It’s my job.”

“Yeah, but you’re also my wife,” she spat. “You made a commitment.”

“I’m not the one threatening to leave!”

Tears streamed down Sarah’s face and she nodded slowly. “You’re right. But I make an effort. I’m the only one trying in this relationship. And I’m done giving. I haven’t gotten anything in return. I can’t anymore.”

Katherine looked down at her emerald wedding ring then straightened. “Then don’t.” And with that, she turned and left, dropping the ring on the floor.

\------

*Go with peace and love

Gather up your tears, keep 'em in your pocket

Save 'em for a time when you're really gonna need em*

\-----

“I shouldn’t have let you go.” Sarah held back a sob. The other funeral go-ers had left. So Sarah was left with nothing but bouquets and a grey headstone. "I was an idiot. You called, and I should have answered. I was so wrapped up in myself. You're boss sent you somewhere you weren't comfortable with." She dropped to her knees and sobbed. "Why didn't I just pick up?"

\------

*The sharp knife of a short life

Well, I've had just enough time*

\-----

''Saz." she looked up at her brother, who had called her name four times now. She was helping clean the dishes in the kitchen. 

"I'm sorry, Davey."

“Are you going to be okay?” 

She hesitated. “I've made my choice.” 

“But are you happy with it?” she stopped. 

In truth, She was miserable. She loved Katherine, and here she was throwing her away. Although, Katherine had made her choice as well. Her phone rang and she jumped. 

Incoming Call from:  
Kat

Her finger hovered over the answer button for just a second before declining it. less than a minute later, Katherine left a message but Sarah ignored that too.

~~~~~

Sarah was sitting on the bed in Davey and Spot's guestroom, watching bootlegs on her laptop when her phone rang again. She thought it might be Katherine but it was an unknown number. Who would call her at 3 a.m.? She furrowed her brow and picked up.

"Hello?"

"I'm looking for Sarah Jacobs?"

"This is she." She stood and started pacing.

"You were listed as the contact for Katherine Jacobs. I'm calling from NYU Langone Medhattan Urgent Care Center. Katherine was shot. Sh-"  
Sarah missed everything after that. She ran out of the room and found Davey at the table going over papers.

"We need to go to the hospital." He looked over at her, concerned.

"Why?"

~~~~~

After an hour of waiting in the waiting room, they were led to a hallway and told to wait. After another hour, a doctor came to them. Hope immediately filled Sarah and she stood, but her hope was crushed when he took his glasses off and sighed defeatedly. 

"No.'' Davey pulled her close. The doctor took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry." Sarah shook her head as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"No, no, no, no, no..." She collapsed into her brother's arms. The doctor explained what happened, where she was hit, when she was hit, how much blood she lost. But Davey was the one who listened. Sarah heard nothing. When the doctor left, Davey sat her down and crouched in front of her. He didn't know what to say. He looked up as Spot rounded the corner with Jack, Blink, Mush, and Smalls. 

Smalls put her hand over her mouth. "Oh my god." Blink stormed away in the direction they'd come. Mush looked between Sarah and Jack and followed Blink, trying to stop him from doing something stupid.

\-----

*So put on your best boys, and I'll wear my pearls  
What I never did is done  
A penny for my thoughts—oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar  
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner  
And maybe then you'll hear the words I've been singin'  
Funny when you're dead, how people start listenin'

If I die young, bury me in satin  
Lay me down on a bed of roses  
Sink me in the river at dawn  
Send me away with the words of a love song*

\-----

Sarah took one last look at the headstone before standing up and slowly making her way out of the cemetery. The words still rung in her head. 

*Sink me in the river at dawn.*

They’d done everything else. It wasn’t dawn but it would have to do. She walked a little more than a mile, ignoring everyone and everything. She looked down at the path right in front of her and didn’t look up until she heard the waves crashing against the sidewalk. It wasn’t what she was hoping, or where Katherine would want, but Sarah had to work with what she had. 

She pulled a small metal box out of her bag and opened it. 

A folded up piece of newspaper. Katherine’s first published article. 

A picture of them at their wedding.

Another folded up, wrinkled paper with a list of baby names. They were going to adopt, they had candidates lined up. 

She moved some of the other contents of the box and pulled out Katherine's wedding ring. She lifted it toward the sky, letting the sunlight dance in the emerald. She slid the ring into a small pocket of her bag and zipped it closed so it wouldn’t fall out. Then she picked up some small rocks and went back to the railing. 

"Sarah?" she turned to the source of the voice.

"Blink... Mush..." They approached her, their arms linked. She avoided Blink's gaze. Mush looked between the two.

"I'll give you two some time." He walked to a bench to their left. Blink put his hand on the railing and looked out over the water. Then he nodded to the box in her hand.

"What's that?" 

“She had-” she stumbled over the word “- a kind of ‘keep safe’ box. Important things.”

“And the rocks?” Sarah rolled the stones in her palm.

“To weigh it down.” Blink furrowed his brow as she put the stones in the box, closed and locked it. She pulled her arm back. 

“Saz, wait!” But it was too late. The box was a good distance away and already sinking into the water. He glared at her, eyes wide with confusion. “Why would you do that?!”

She watched it disappear under the waves then pulled out another piece of paper. “This paper was in the box with my name on it.” She handed him the note. “The box was water-proof and nothing was ruined. But since you can’t legally sink a dead body in the river, it said to just do this.” Blink read the note but shook his head. He dropped the note and started taking his shirt off. Mush stood.“What are you doing?” 

Blink climbed over the rail and jumped into the water, near the place the box sank. 

“BLINK!” Mush ran to the rail next to Sarah. “What is he doing??” 

“He’s getting Katherine’s box…”

“Why was it in the river?”

“It’s where she told me to put it.” Blink popped up out of the water. 

“Blink, are you insane?!” Blink held up the box and Sarah groaned. 

“Leave it out there,” she begged. “Please.” 

“HEY.” They all looked at an older man, who was in his boat. “You can’t be in there, there’s no swimming.” Blink started swimming back to the shore and reached his hand up. Mush grabbed it and pulled him over the rail and hit him with his shirt. 

“Idiot!” 

“Where’s the box?” Blink tried to catch his breath.

“In the river,” he said, looking at Sarah, conflicted. She hesitated, took a deep breath, then nodded. 

“Good.”  
\-----  
*So put on your best boys,  
and I'll wear my pearls*


End file.
